No, Tears for Tuna is not the name of my eco-conscious 80's cover band, it's what I went through the other night trying to get J. to eat a very kid-friendly tuna casserole. Cooking does not come naturally to me so I am making a real effort (and it is an effort) to make healthy meals for the family, so I was trying out the Tuna Casserole from the great "Tin Fish Gourmet" cookbook. J. refused to eat it, said it wasn't the noodles he liked (which is pasta with pesto!) and when told that this was dinner and it was all he was getting, he burst into tears. You could tell he was kind of forcing it, but after a while, when he wasn't getting anywhere with it, he actually gave up and ate the darn stuff! Being lovingly firm and consistent with your child actually works! Who'd of thunk it?
And he actually never knew there was tuna in it. I've learned that less is more when it comes to toddler eating so J. is now on a need to know basis. He eats fish sticks but we've told him they are chicken. He hasn't noticed yet that they don't taste like chicken. It might be the mounds of ketchup he puts on everything he eats. I'm going to get away with lying to my kids for their own good as long as I can. I was in my 20's before I figured out, after being mocked and publicly shamed by other friends who weren't as gullible as me, that despite what my mother had told me repeatedly, there were not "flour worms" in uncooked baked goods, specifically cookie dough, that would make you sick if you ate it. She had just been trying to keep me from eating all the cookie dough.
As for the second part of my title, I believe my other child is going to be my eater. As I mentioned before, it turns out I have been starving the wee baby M. and the milk jugs have not been producing enough to meet his needs. He's one of those kids that watches you eat with frightening intensity. It's like a scene from "Empire of the Sun" when the POW detainees are watching their captors eat opulent meals while they are barely surviving on potatoes and weevils for protein. He just turned 5 months, so we started him on rice cereal and after one bite, he was trying to grab the spoon out of my hand and shove more in his mouth. He's had four bowls so far and cleans the plate every time. He's like a baby bird open it's mouth for worms. So tonight as I was feeding him, I was singing him the Band Aid "Do They Know It's Christmas?" song because he is my starving child. I suppose it might seem shallow and trite to be singing a song about African famine to a relatively well cared for baby who will hopefully never truly know hunger in his lifetime, but he really seemed to enjoy it. Perhaps tomorrow night I can regale him with the far inferior "We Are The World". Sorry, no Canadian content, even though the government does require 30%. I will not be doing "Tears Are Not Enough", although it was better than the narcissistic, god-complex ridden "We Are The World".
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...And on the Seventh Day God invented Ketchup.
Everyone I speak to never remembers being as picky as our kids are today when it comes to dinner time. Maybe it was because our parents had "less" or maybe it was because they were stricter/tougher on us. I think it is neither.
Our parents were all simple meat and potato people. There were not McDonalds and Starbucks on every corner. We ate porkchops with Cambells Mushroom soup gravy on potatos 2 nights a week, Spagehtti 2 nights a week (always leftovers) and three nights of beef (usually some casseroles and/or ground beef conconctions).
Food was boring!!
Sushi...never heard of it.
Curry? Excuse me, what is that?
Spices? You mean salt and pepper?
Our tastebuds have been overstimulated and we cannot make the boring crap of our mothers of old. When the special meal of the year is roast turkey --- I meal I love --- but lets face it, turkey is about as bland a food as there is. As a kid you choke it down for the promise of pumpkin pie. Somewhere along the line you discover stuffing (the only flavorful part of the meal) which then creates the "potato/turkey/stuffing/gravy" mixture on your plate. Oooo lets spice it up with some....salt and pepper. Boring.
Our kids aren't picky...we are supplying overly challenging foods we never faced. New parents complain about cooking the same meals over and over again just so their kids will eat something. Think back to your own childhood. Spagehtti night again????
Do not fear though, one day your kids will suddenly like something bizarre. This last couple months my oldest boy has discovered Salmon and cannot get enough it.
Of course, number two son choked his down as he dipped it in a gallon of Ketchup.
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